The Meaning...

Adia,


When I found out I was having a little baby girl, I pondered a few different names.  But I was certain Adia would be your name.  It is a beautiful and very uncommon name.  I wanted a special name for my special baby.  So how did I decide 100% on this name?

When I was 14 years old, I got a Sarah McLachlan CD and a song named 'Adia' soon became my favorite song.  I remember my little teenage-self telling my mom while riding in her Blazer, "When I grow up and have a baby, I want to name her Adia."  I loved the way the name sounded; it was so different. 

Flash forward 10 years later, I have a baby girl growing in my womb and it's time to pick out a name.  I think back to my love of the name Adia and ask your Daddy if he likes it.  He agrees that he wants an uncommon name, a name that's different from the norm.  We wanted a name that would stand out among all the other typical girl names.  The next step was to look up the actual meaning of the name Adia.  Seeing the meaning of Adia sealed the deal for both of us.

Adia :: meaning Gift, in Swahili
Adia :: meaning Gift from God, in Hebrew

You are definitely a gift from God.  Not only to me, but to everyone you see.  You pick out the scariest people in my eyes, (the big, old, scruffy, tattooed, thug-looking men) and you smile, wave and say "Hiiiiii!!"  They can't help but to smile and say "Hi" back to you.  When we go through the check out line in Wal-mart, the cashier can be the type that doesn't talk to us and just wants her shift to be over (can't blame her) but you smile and tell her "Thank you, Byyyye!"  She smiles back at you, and says "Bye, baby."  We can be walking around downtown; pass by a group of men and when they see you they all stop talking and smile.

I believe you can warm the coldest of hearts, you can brighten the dullest days, you can bring joy to the saddest eyes.  You are God's gift to this old, cruel world.  I hope you stay this happy, joyous, and confident.  And with a name like Adia, I think the odds are in your favor that you will always be a unique and wonderful gift to everyone you meet in your lifetime.

I love you more than words can say, Adia.  Thank you for being you.

     

Your Memsie...

Adia,

I could not have asked for a better Mama.  And you could not have a better Memsie!  She is such a special woman in so many ways.  I want to share a glimpse of my relationship with Memsie through the years and your blossoming relationship with her. 

Memsie is my best friend.  She has always been my best friend.  I have always felt very proud of the special relationship my mom and I have.. I can only hope and pray that you and I will one day have this same relationship.  Growing up my mom was a perfect mother.  She was extremely patient, slow to anger, nurturing, loving and selfless.  I never longed for attention.  She was always around to give me encouragement, reassurance, hugs and kisses.  I always had my needs met and she payed attention to anything I was interested in.

Memsie can make anything fun.  She could make driving to the flea market into an exciting adventure!  She'd wake me and Uncle Adam up on Saturday mornings to take us on one of her magical adventures.  We'd end up at the flea market, the beach, the park, the mall, Walmart, or maybe McDonalds. Yes, those places were very exciting to us as young children! One day that adventure took me to sign up for Girls Scouts. Once I got into middle school, the surprise adventures turned into a Saturday morning tradition of going to either Hardee's or Chick-fil-A for a chicken biscuit. Memsie and I did the biscuit tradition until we moved to Savannah. 

During middle school and high school, some friends of mine would comment on the relationship my mom and I had.. they thought it was nice that I was so close to my mom.  I would openly say that my Mom was my best friend.  A lot of teenagers go through a stage where they strongly dislike their Mom and completely shut them out of their life.  I never went through that stage.  I knew I needed my mom, still do.  I stayed out of a lot of trouble during my teens and I chalk that up to having such a close relationship with my mom. 

Even though my mom has been my best friend, there were still rules and I have always respected her. There's never been a time when I thought I knew better than my mom about something.  She still knows better than I do about things!  She has definitely helped me with becoming a mom myself.

Memsie loves you to pieces.  She's so good with you.  And oh, so, patient.  Watching her interact with you makes me feel like an inadequate mom compared to her.  When she's hurting and sick, she stills gets down on the floor or marches around the kitchen with you.  When her back is killing her, she stills holds you and loves on you.  That's some unconditional love! 

 She inspires me to be a great mom.  If I am half as wonderful as she is, then I'll be happy. And all the credit to me being a good mom goes directly to her. She is simply amazing as a mom and as a Memsie.

Watch The Lamb...

Adia,

Today you and I are having a music day.  Some days we just listen to music and color or dance until nap time.  Today I was on YouTube and looked up a song I've known since I was a young girl.  It is an incredible song and so moving.  As we listened to it today it brought tears to my eyes.  The song is called, "Watch the Lamb" by Ray Boltz.  When I was a young girl I performed in a skit that acted out the words of this song. Your Papa played the Daddy.  I was one of the 'sons'.  Some people of my church acted out the angry mob, shouting "Crucify Him, Kill Him" when the man playing Jesus came walking down the church aisle.  I remember feeling scared but then I reminded myself that this was just pretend.  I remember the Roman Guard actor forcing my Dad to pick up the cross that Jesus couldn't carry anymore. I remember him being shoved around by the Guard and I felt so helpless.  But again, I reminded myself my Dad wasn't really being hurt, this was just a skit.  At the end of the song the words say, "I felt two little hands holding tight to mine.."  At that point, me and the other actor walked up and grabbed my Dad's hands.  When he looked down at us, he had been so moved by the song and the skit, he was really crying.  I felt sad, I didn't like seeing my Dad cry.  I started crying too.  In the skit, the children were supposed to be upset because it was their responsibility not to let their little lamb run away.  We asked for forgiveness because the lamb had run away.  My Dad fell to his knees, hugged us, and then pointed up to the cross and the man playing Jesus while these words were sung, "I took them in my arms and we turned and faced the cross. Then I said, 'Dear Children, Watch the lamb.....'"  

Jesus is our lamb.  Every time we sin, Jesus has already paid the price so we can be forgiven.  I don't want you to ever lose sight of the real lamb.  We all sin, but I hope you always remember how much God loves us.  He sent his son to die for us and we should strive to live the way Christ lived.  So willing to die for us, so willing to forgive the hands that killed him.

I love you Adia.

Your Papa...

Adia,


I am so happy that you have an amazing relationship with my Dad.  He loves you to pieces and you are already getting away with so much more than I ever did. I'm sure there will be many different stories and things you will hear about Papa but I just wanted to put down in words how he has made me the person I am.

The very first thing I remember bonding over with my dad was music.  On trips upstate to visit family or to go on vacation, I would have to have my cassette tape player and some of his tapes.  He was born in 1951, so he was a really big fan of the music of the late 50's, 60's and 70's.  I developed an almost obsession with that era of music at a very young age.  My first favorite songs on his tapes were:  "The Leader of the Pack" by The Shangri-Las, "Little Red Riding Hood" - by Sam the Sham, "Turn, Turn, Turn" by The Byrds, and "With a Little Help from My Friends" by Joe Cocker.  He had the music of Woodstock on cassette tapes and I would fast-fast forward and rewind that tape so many times to listen to that Joe Cocker song.  I'm surprised any of his cassette tapes survived my childhood.  And I'm realizing right now, you won't even know what a cassette tape is when you get older.  Oh wow, way to age myself.

Papa started my love for history and politics.  Since I was already in love with music from a very intense political era, I became interested in John F. Kennedy and the Vietnam War .  Later I developed a strong interest in World War II and the Holocaust.  Papa and I love historical war movies.  In fact, I remember going to see 'We Were Soldiers' in the movie theater with him.  Just me and Papa.  I can't remember when I became so into politics, but I have been as long as I can remember.  At the dinner table during my college years, our conversations would mainly be about politics or current events happening in the world.  I couldn't wait to have discussions with Papa about different things my professors would say or just get his opinion on news topics.  The dinner talks were definitely the highlight of my day.  

He taught me how to be modest when it came to dressing myself.  When all the other girls at church or school would wear short skirts/shorts, tight jeans, and low cut shirts, my Dad would not let me leave the house in anything he thought was immodest.  Which I am really thankful for now.  You don't have to show anything but your personality to be attractive.

He taught me to be respectful.  I remember one time my mom was sewing an Easter dress for me.  I think I was in 3rd grade.  My dad over heard me saying something to my mom that sounded rude.  It was along the lines of, "No, I don't want to try it on again."  She made me go show my Dad to see what he thought of the dress, he said, "You do not talk to your Mom that way." Talk about putting the fear of God into someone... Sometimes, most times, all Papa would have to do was give me a look and I knew to straighten up.  Again, I'm thankful he was a true disciplinarian.  When you respect others, you respect yourself.  

Papa taught me that no one is perfect; we all make mistakes.  But he also taught me you can be perfect in your imperfections.  He doesn't hold grudges and you will never hear him judging anyone, unless it's a politician.  He absolutely hates gossip and you will never hear him get involved in it.  He taught me that I am no better than anyone else.  He is non-confrontational usually.  In his line of work I think some people think they can back him into a corner and he can't/won't do anything.  He taught me sometimes it's better to just hold your tongue.  It takes a strong person to let things go, and Papa is just that. 

I hope to pass on to you all the values and interests Papa and I share.  You are Papa's little angel.  

American Pride

Adia,

You and I went out to get some groceries today.  When we were driving through the neighborhood I noticed only one American Flag.  We are the youngest family living in this neighborhood, and the only family who flies an American Flag.  At first, the thought just made me kinda sad, then it made me angry.  We have become so comfortable, as a nation, we take our freedom for granted.  And we don't unite as one people.  Right now, there is a lot of bickering over the current Obama Administration and the Republicans are fighting each other for the nomination to run against Obama later this year.  I am very interested in politics and very passionate about what I believe.  Your daddy and I have our own political debates, and I'm sure once you can form sentences you will join in.  And I encourage and will hope that you educate yourself on politics.  But I don't want you to be political and not patriotic.   

Sometimes we are so busy with the messy details of each party that we forget we are ALL Americans.  No matter if people are Democrats or Republicans... We are all Americans.  We should all be so patriotic and grateful for our freedom that we all fly American flags.  We should all respect the soldiers who have fought for our freedoms.  We should all stand to say the Pledge of Allegiance, and when the National Anthem is played.

Tonight I was watching news coverage of rebel fighters in Syria who are trying to overtake the current government.  The government has now killed 6,000 people and Syrians are pleading to the US for help; to save their lives.  And there I sat, sitting on my couch eating tacos.  I thought how awesomely free I am.  I'm sitting here with basically no immediate worries on my mind, while there are people in other countries getting killed because they voice disapproval of their government.  It's times like these I swell up with pride in and thankfulness for my forefathers who sacrificed so much for me to be free.

We decorate every Fourth of July.  We stand when we ever hear the National Anthem and place our right hand over our hearts.  We pay our respects to American soldiers by attending memorials.  We shake a soldier's hand every chance we get and say thank you for your service.  We vote to make sure Veterans get their well deserved benefits.  They took care of us, we need to take care of them.  And we fly our free nation's flag proudly!

African American History Month...

Adia,

If there is one thing you learn from me I hope it is seeing everyone as an equal to you.  No matter the skin color, you are no better than anyone else.  Growing up in the south is not an easy place to be if you're trying to be accepting of all people.  There are still many hard lines drawn in the sand about what is right and what is wrong when it comes to other races.  It's getting better though, and my hope is that it will be an even lesser issue when you are grown.  I also encourage you to cross those lines, ignore those prejudices, and to be 'color blind'.

February is African American History month.  I have always been interested in the history of African Americans and the civil rights movements of the 1950's and 1960's.  I have tried to educate myself on African American history, which I will encourage you to do as well.  I am looking forward to taking you to Montgomery, Alabama to see where Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat on the bus.  There is a Rosa Parks museum in Montgomery and a Civil Rights Memorial/Museum as well.  I grew so much as a person from going to those places and being surrounded by that history.

In the Rosa Parks museum, they have a walk-through exhibit of the exact events that occurred the night Rosa Parks was arrested.  The museum has a replica of the bus that Rosa Parks was on that world-changing night. As I was standing in front of the bus, listening to audio of men and women screaming obscene, demeaning vulgarities and threatening the life of Mrs. Parks, I started to shake.  My heart started beating faster.  I started breathing heavy, and was getting chills.  The audio ignited the 'fight or flight' mechanism in my body and I wanted to run.  I felt this hopelessness wash over my body and was frozen in fear.  When the audio went off, I exhaled with relief thanking God it was over.  Then I realized, this was an every day occurrence in the life of so many African Americans during that time.  My heart broke into so many pieces over and over during the days I spent in Montgomery, Alabama.  It is so impossibly hard for me to believe that one human being could treat another human being so horribly.  I believe it happened for far too long, and I passionately believe it must never happen again.

Some people you encounter through the years will voice that they don't see why there should be a month specifically dedicated to African American history.  The reason I want you to remember is, we need this month to come around every year so we will never forget the horrible things African Americans have gone through.  History must not, and simply cannot, repeat itself in that way.  So by remembering all the tortured African American souls and their stories in February of every year, surely we will be reminded of the inhumane mistakes we made and continue to learn from those mistakes.  We also need this month to remind people about all the great accomplishments and inventions African Americans have contributed to our country and to the world.  Some people will continue to be raised to think African Americans aren't an equal, but by reminding them of the genius minds of African Americans, maybe one day they will realize their ignorant beliefs are so unfounded. 

A personal story relating to our family during the 1920-40's in the south:  Your Great-Grandfather Moore was pretty much raised by a black man, named Sam.  When I first learned about this as a younger child, I was so ashamed that my family would participate in, what I thought, was slavery.  But I later learned the real story and he was not a slave at all.  Your Great-Grandfather's mother preferred and loved working outside, so she would work the fields while Sam watched the kids.  The exact quote to describe a typical day in their life was, "Mrs. Moore would be out working in the fields while Sam sat, played and read with the children under the trees."  I think that is such a neat history.  Sam lived with the Moore's and I'm assuming they paid him to watch after the kids, but I know they treated him as one of the family.  I wish so badly I could have met him.  I believe he helped mold the mind of your Great-Grandfather.  Sam helped your Great-Grandfather see that everyone is indeed equal.  Your Great-Grandfather passed that knowledge down to your Papa and your Papa passed it on to me.  From what I've heard, Sam was an easy-going and down to earth man, as was your Great-Grandfather. I truly believe Sam is very much a part of who I am, and a part of who you are as well... And for that I feel privileged and so thankful.

I am very much inspired to learn more about Mr. Sam.  And I hope to record it all down for you.  Always remember, every human being is a gift to this world so make sure you treat them that way.  

What you do for your children...

Adia,

Lately I have been unfortunate to see parents not doing the best things for their children.  I whole-heartedly believe that as your mother it is my 100%, God-given responsibility to do anything and everything to provide you with a safe, happy, loving, and healthy life.

On a general level, parents may sometimes have to work a job they hate in order to provide for their children, parents may have to move away from the only home they have ever known in order to provide a healthy, adequate living for their children. Parents might not be able to do the things they did before they had children.  They might have to give up going shopping anytime they want, going on trips, or buying expensive nonsense 'things' for themselves.  Once you are a parent, everything is about your child/children.  No matter how much you don't like the sacrifice you need to make, it's your duty as a parent.

On a personal level, if your Dad and I had not moved from Florence I would have never been able to be a stay at home mom.  There were no jobs available for Dad in Florence in order for him to be the official bread winner, allowing me to stay home.  Granted, I had to make a major sacrifice.  I had to move away from my family and friends.  That was not easy and still isn't easy.  I don't think it will ever be easy being away from my family.  It's hard living in a new city where I don't have close friends. It's hard not being able to have date nights with my husband because I don't trust anyone but my parents to watch you, yet.  We also had to limit our spending on ourselves in order for us to afford my staying at home.  Daddy had to give up his shopping for designer clothes/new cars, and I had to give up my addiction to eating out at restaurants/weekend getaway trips.  BUT I am able to stay at home with you every day.  I know you are being fed exactly what you need to eat, I know you are being changed when you dirty your diaper, and I know you are being treated the way little ones should be treated.  I was able to witness your first steps, and hear you say 'Mama' for the first time.  I can take you to the doctor at any time you need to be there.  When your Daddy and I were both working, that was a big issue. 

So believe me, the sacrifices I made have been worth it.  There is nothing in this material world that would keep me from taking care of you to the absolute BEST of my ability.  There is nothing that would stand in my way of keeping you safe and healthy.  If I had to move to a new place every year, in order to give you the best life possible, we would make it work.  There would be no excuses.  We would work jobs we didn't necessarily like, we would live in a one bedroom apartment, we would sell our cars and use public transportation, we would starve so you could eat.  I promise you, you will always be taken care of, no matter the sacrifices we have to make.  No sacrifice is too much for you.  I only wish all parents would come to realize their duties.
 

Beating hearts...

Adia,

You've been sick this week.  You had an ear infection so I've been giving you antibiotic.  I hope the illness is gone.  You've been pretty restless at night, so that makes for a really tiresome day.  Tonight you crawled up into my lap and sat with me.  You wanting to be held is a pretty rare thing so it made my heart sing.  You looked up at me with such sleepy eyes.  So, I rocked you and you fell asleep within seconds.  I haven't rocked you to sleep since you were probably 4 months old.  I was able to carry you up the stairs and lay you in your crib without disturbing your sweet slumber. 

As I was laying you down, my hand could feel your heart beating.  Time stopped.  I looked at you and thought to myself, "Beating hearts are such miracle. How fragile are our lives and why don't even notice. We are kept alive by a simple beating heart." I went on to thank God for giving me my own living miracle to share this life with.  Then I thought, "I don't know what I would do if your heart ever stopped beating.." I know one day each of our hearts will stop beating here on Earth.  But I pray to God that mine will stop beating before yours.